Would I love to lose about 10 pounds? Yep!
Do I wish my thighs wouldn't rub together when I walk? Yes!
Do I wish I had less cellulite on my thighs? Absolutely!
Do I wish my butt was little smaller? It'd be nice.
Do I long to have a smooth, flat abdominal area again, like I did before I had kids? Yes.
Today, however....I looked upon my body with pride. I saw it as the vehicle that has carried me through more joyous moments and war zones than I can count. And it still does. It has housed my my emotions, expressed and repressed, and has told me through spells of chronic pain how much it hates when I repress my emotions. So I removed my filter and speak from my heart and from a place of truth as much as possible so my body doesn't carry the weight and painful burden of secrets and lies. When I express my joy, get silly, have giggle fits and experience the effervescent, infectious bliss that is my truest nature, my body is happy because it just got really high off endorphins!
I know that my body carries a wisdom that the young, nubile bodies that walk into my yoga classes don't yet possess. My body has experienced moments of insane strength and flexibility that, on occasion, has surprised even me. Astavakrasana being my favorite display of that strength and focus that came to me when I least expected it. My body has known injury and devastating pain that served to teach me the importance of good alignment and excellent core strength. Learning to breathe in such a way to calm and heal my body in moments of stress is something my body has benefitted from greatly that most people regard as overrated. My body has experienced pregnancy and child birth which is joyous and traumatic at the same time. No amount of core strength will keep the loose skin around my belly from sagging down as I lower into a Chaturanga Danadasana during class. I could hide it, but sometimes I don't want to. This is my body and it has served me well. There is nothing to be ashamed of.
I find myself in class sometimes crying tears of gratitude for my body as I fold into a Janu Sirsasana or Paschimottansana....welling over with pride at how far we have come together. Bowing in love and reverence for the trials and joys we have been through together. Those moments are most precious to me and give perspective to what's truly important. Good health and happiness are the most important....not the image of perfection the media wants us to buy into. Women are meant to have curves and more fatty tissue than men. We are supposed to be soft and supple. Embrace it all. The curves, the folds, the stretch marks, the cellulite. Women's bodies were designed to create and carry new life, give birth and then feed and nurture that new life. Our softness ends up being the sanctuary for our babies. What's not to love about that?
